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07/22
how sweet it is to be loved by you... blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah 07/11
there is this guy who calls my house every once in a while. his name is carlos, and he always asks for maria. today he called four times. you'd think hed get the idea that the number he was calling was NOT THE RIGHT ONE. anyway, our third conversation went as follows:
10 pm
ring ring
"hullo?"
"hello, is maria there?"
"hey carlos, its erin again."
"oh damn"
"sorry man"
"its okay, you know, she dont love me anyway"
"who? maria?"
"yeah, man, she be wit some other man now she dont need me"
"oh carlos, i'm sorry"
"she loved me though, i know it"
"oh yeah?"
"yeah. she's so beautiful erin, you dont know, i just want her back so bad."
"i know what its like to miss someone. what you gotta do is go out with your boys a bit, just chill. see how long you can go without thinking of her. you know? just distract yourself, and you'll find out that it doesnt take a girl to make you happy."
"oh man, thanks erin."
"no problem man. just have a good time, and just try not to think about her too much"
okay, bye erin
bye carlos
about ten minutes later, the phone rings.
"hello?"
"hi, is maria there?"
"go to bed carlos."
"damn. bye erin." 06/24
the first day of summerschool. boy that was interesting. its really too bad that we didnt get mrs. yappel... or however you spell it. i think that that would have made the class a little funner. im not excited about not having to wear a uniform. i hate picking out what to wear everyday. at least this way it would have been structured. blah. mom's coming home form denver today, woop woop.
oh! we got the itinerary for hungary!! its going to be a really really awesome trip, i'm stoked. i'm really glad we're meeting up with the san clemente teams too, because that will be tight. oh man its going to be so much funnnn... i cant wait !!!
06/21
been doing a lot of reconstruction on the site... 06/19
let me tell you what summers all about.
i havent showered in 4 whole days. now that is beautiful. i havent worn real clothing since fathers day, pajama pants and bikinis are my attire. when i do leave the house, i dont wear socks. i havent worn a bra in three whole days. ahh. this is the life. too bad that all changes next week.
summerschool. blah. at least im taking life management skills. ::yawn:: who really needs a class that will teach you not to jump off a bridge? i think perhaps this class would have been more useful to me last summer. too bad i was taking a shit class last summer too. the moral of the story is, okay, there is no moral. shut up. at least my mom will let me leave the house.
yesterday, i worked all morning and then played polo from 5 till god knows when. that was really fun, because i got to play tank, which is a rare expirience for me. but it was really really fun. i wish that we had practice today too, because i didnt really realize how much i had missed playing polo until yesterday. it was my third time playing in the pool since CIF. yikes.
i wasnt as out of shape as i thought i was though. i suppose that thats a good thing. but wow, that was soo mcuh fun. we were sitting in the corner, and keri was in the goal, and ryan asked me if i wanted to play field. i said "i thought youd never ask!!"
we also started making up songs during the game... not really mking them up, but singing songs and putting "booby" in. the most successful was
my name is booby
(da na na na na)
i live in a tree
(da na na na na)
i like dem nuts
(da na na na na)
like cashews and peas
cuz, im booby, booby, booooooooby
im booby, booby, boooooooooby
and yes, i know that a pea is not a nut. so what?
and the other one was
did you ever know that youre a strange bird?
and that youre my favorite goalie?
and you can block goals like no other...
cause you are the blue footed booby
i like how i make up songs about myself for others to sing to me
you can count on a goalie when she's really cool
we all need somebody like errrrrrrin
when the rest of the defense is on the other side of the pool
we all need somebody like errrrrrrin!
hey, what the heck. it's my favorite topic. we all need somebody like strange bird. 06/18
ahh, tuesdays.
lets see... my quest for people to come over and swim was... somewhat successful. i suppose. christi, sara, dan, brandon and becca came over, in waves. we watched moulin rouge and went swimming, or something. dan spent the night.
KOREA BEAT ITALY this morning. seriously there have been soo many upsets in this world cup its not even funny.
all day today, i have been painting benches. benches benches everywhere and not a drop to drink. i got a bad sports bra tan... attractive.
oooh! megan and i are going to re-do megan and erins greatest hits, and we're going to add a few more songs: "one sun", a song reassuring that we only hate you with the firey passion of one sun, instead of 1,000. "the poo hits the fan" a song about, well, shit hitting the fan. and a few others...
i know youre quivering with antici.........pation
anyway. peace out
e 06/17
today is the first day of the rest of my life.
god, i love summer. it really is great. i mean, what is better than sitting by the pool all day doing nothing but reading and drinking lemonade and occasionally running through the sprinklers? nothing, thats right.
yesterday was an interesting day. the guy who lives on par four who's dad owns a bmw dealership IMed me. i found out that his brother is good friends with chase, and that both the brothers used to be friends with eric gardner. they even remember the time that we launched waterballoons at their house last summer. not that we knew who they were... it was still a rather interesting expirience. also, that same evening, laurel and i saw one of the brothers at blockbuster. go figure.
laurel and i rocked out in the car to wee sing silly songs. ahhh the memories of our childhood.
i had a long talk with preston last night. hes going to teachme how to play raquetball, and i'm going to teach him how to play polo. we also talked about religion, and i found our copy of Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis, and i'm going to read it.
sorry about me going link crazy. i just figured out how to make links in the middle of text, so thats exciting. shut up.but check them out, and stuff. thats fun.
its also being a pishinot, and not wanting to be the same color. bah. i hate stupid computer.
just kidding, i love you computer. dont hurt me.
i'm also working on the ABLF website, and that should be up and running pretty soon, so yeah.
peace
e 6/15/02
my poor neglected website how i miss you!
yes, its true, im back to my beautiful website, and im sure all of you are rejoicing. i mean, fun fun fun. well, summer is here, again, and i think i'm going to start maintaining this here website, so expect some super awesome changes (hopefully, i'll stick to my promise.) i was reading through my beautiful entries, and man am i funny. oh my goodness.
so. summer. yeah
last night, laurel and i went over to zac's house to hang out with zac, mijeong, gret and eric. boy, that was siblingerific.
and also, i have never seen a cat as fat as the cat they have. lord that thing is about the size of a beachball, and i'm not exagerating. freaking bustifer jones is what i'm talking about. 26 pounds of cat. damn, seriously.
anyway, the sibs are coming over for fathers day, so i gotta go help my mother prepare or something.
peace out
e
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ capitans log
stargate 12.19
go american shoe team ::erin gets smacked in the head:: hey im used to it, i get smacked in the head about 20 times a day. anyway. i have big hair
no really
my harir is huge
but i like it
i made a coolquiz and it ROCKS
christmas kinda snook (what is the past tense of sneak?) anyway christmas kinda sneaked/snook up on me this year and i dont have presents for anyone
or time to make cards
or bake cookies
but i hope that i get the three things that i asked for this year
yes, that is
the rest of the star wars toothbrush collection series: darth vader, jar jar binks and anakin
a sewing machine ( which im sure my mom is going to get me)
and a guitar (which i really want, but i doubt im going to get.)
oh well
christmas.
what a great holiday
if only it didnt come right in the middle of polo season.
say la VEE
Captian's log
stargate 12.09
today, i have time. for the first time, i have time.
you always ask me why i never update anything, well the truth of it is, im busy, and i havent time/energy/patience to work with this damn computer. to tell you the truth, i wont stay very long, i have practice today, and that will totally smash what patience i have right now to pieces. Michelle quit the team yesterday. this came as a shock to me for one because i had no idea it was coming, and had i had so much as a clue, i would have wantedto prevent it. i suppose she did cry for help, in a way, by not coming to practice. but, still. she never talked to me personally about what was going on in her life, what was i going to do?i want to call her, and tell her i respect her decision and that its okay, but to tell you the truth, im a little pissed. she was one of aour better players this year, and i hope that she understands what a hole she made in the team. anyway, the girls talked about it like it was good riddance but im going to miss her. i think she was one of the nicest people on the team (thats not saying much considering the selection)and i'll miss her dancing up in the varsity room, and her words of encouragement, man, im making it sound as if she died... anyway, im going to go get ready for practice because well, i dont have much else of a choice now do i? i cant lower the standards of the team. 12/04
hey it really is december now
thank the heavens.
anyway, it is christmas now at the hanscom house, and my dad has been playing christmas music even before we took down the halloween decorations.(which was two weeks ago, actually.)
my parents i decided, are christmas fanatics. i mean i have nothing against christmas, but when mom in dad say get out the decorations, it means hours of unwrapping and planning and "oh where should we put this string of lights?" and "wouldnt this santa look cutre here?"
yes, its very true, my parents suffer from a bad case of E.P.U.C.T.S. (Excessive Purchasing of Useless Christmas Trinkets.) symptoms include: more closet space reserved for christmas decorations than clothes, sevral different sets of santa - rudolph/mrs claus/christmas tree/snowman salt and pepper shakers, christmas flatware, christmas mobiles, and a collection of nativity scenes. and judging by that, my folks are never going to recover.
not to mention, over half of the cd's in our whole house (including my personal cd's...) are christmas. and we only have a 5 cd disk changer! oh well, you know where you can go to get into the christmas spirt, yes thats right, anytime between now and, well, early march.
anyway, hope your month(s) will be as great as mine.
11/28
lets do the time warp again.
man im retarded, i thought that last week was this week. oh im so confused.
anyway
a funny thing happened today. it all started a few weeks ago when my mom schedualed my doctor apptment. then i went to it today, and had five dollars left over when i got back to school. i spent a few of thos dollars on a chicken patty, because i love them. i put a lot af ketchup on it, but i had ketchup left over. i brought the ketchup to my 5th and 6th period class like a good girl. then, i was messing around and that ketchup splattered across the room and onto tim. so what did i do? took the remaning ketchup packets and dumped them on the floor all around my desk. i thought mr morales was going to get mad, but he just made me clean up the ketchup. it was an accident afterall.
it sortof reminded me of this time in 7th grade that also involved tim. i once glued a marble to his arm with hot glue, because he was pissing me off. man mrs. hessel go MAD.
anyway, i love being idiotic. im freaking retarded.
also: you know what makes one uncomfortable? showing up in the pediactric section of the doctors office after you drove yourself. man they teased me a lot in there.
anyway. im never going to eat ketchup again!
until tomorrow probably. 12/02
well
it's been a long while now hasnt it?
haha, laurel and i went to hillcrest to go shopping on friday, which was really fun.
my mom got mad at me on friday night because i was out past curfew. that was fun too...
i had a creepy dream last night
my dad got really mad at me because i quit the swim team and joined the rowing team. the rowing team practiced in the pool, which was funny,and mr morales beat up my dad. i remember telling lauren to not tell christi that i was on the rowing team, because i didnt want her to join. or maybe it was the other way around. anyway, dan and i ended up in a hotel room in catalina.
i wonder what this dream meant if anything. my subconcious is retarded.
i got my bathing suit from victorias secret!! sexay. it is cute, but im not going to be able to wear it for a while. oh well. it's still cute.
i got a new sweater too, but it leaves red poop on whatever you wear it over.
i hate little kid action
man, i got stung by a bee yesterday at practice and now my finger is as fat as my thumb.
we're having turkey burritos for dinner tonight. im going to vomit. we dont have any salsa either. watched little rascals last night, and the grinch on friday. the grinch sucked patootie but i love the little rascals. my mom thought buckwheat was a girl. haha.
dan has a catergory on his buddy list that is just for me, and its titled "the fair maiden" thats rediculous.
but anyways. this is getting long and my bee sting hurts, so bye bye
11/03
well well. last night was really fun, i uh went to dans and we had a marshmallow war in his kitchen, which was freaking hilarious. then chad spent the night last night and we watched kingpin. well i wathced half of it, then fell asleep. i dont understand how anyone can bowl with a prosthetic hand.
anyway.
im having a lot of fun. the past four days have been great. but besides that. we have a chinese yo yo.
i was going to put something in here about art for warren, but im not in the mood to think right now, i had too much guacamole while watching football, and now i dont feel so great.
i mean
it was great guacamole, but wow. hehe, mr. morales. WOW!
damnit, i almost forgot about that presentation on monday.
i have to be John D. Rockefeller. ROCKIN
11/01
yay, thanksgiving is coming soon
and do you know what that means. thats right, cranberry from a can
i had a good time on halloween
dan as a cheerleader was very scary. i mean, wow, that turned me on. (shudder)
i never want to see that again. the candy apples turened out pretty gross but the caramel apples were good!
i mean halloween.
i have had some interesting halloweens in my past. i mean the whole krysia thing, the powdered sugar incident, the time we woke up with over 100 pumpkings scattered in our front yard, halloween has always been a pretty interesting holiday, last night was pretty awesome.
anyway, its sleepy time
shrinky dinks. haha 10/30
mood for today: slightly annoyed.
today i seemed to be a step behind, and it began to piss me off. i thihnk its just pms, but seriously, a lot of little things were bothering me today, and i was just letting them slide, but they were making me really kindof mad.
i hate saying specific things, but yeah.
im serioudsly not int he mood to dress up tomorrow, and krysia just called me and i came so close to yelling at her. it wasnt her fault entirely but she blamed me for something that wasnt my duty anyways, and i had just come back from a performance, and my feet hurt and my butt hurts and i was uncomfortaable the whole time, and it didnt help that i was remembering how much i hate that freaking group of girls. some of them are nice, but most piss the hell outta me. i hate that dance i hate those dresses i hate our songs i hate everything about being in that class. i was thinking of switching out at the semester to go into band, but i already shelled out about 1000 bucks to go to france, which will be fun because ill getr to hang with the other people who arent in my group but still, if i have to suffer then it really isnt worth it. all the people that i really like are going to be gone next year, that is except for megan and cody and brian. those are the only people that will be there next year that dont piss me off tremendously. and im tired. i need to take a shower and cool off. 10/26
i promised myself i would never give in to peer pressure, but here i am. and you know what? it feels good.
anyway
two people told me today that they missed it when i didnt put in entries. im sorry guys! im doing my best, i promise!
sushi sushi sushi
right now im supposed to be writing the introductory paragraph of an essay thats supposed to be what was the most memorable day of my life. i dont have a most memorable day. im going to make it up, thats soo much more fun. "the most memorable day of my life is the day that me and a couple of my friends hung out. i laoughed so hard i almost wet myself that day we played tiddly winks and ate sushi until we exploded and toby ate our remains and then barfed them back up onto the kitchen floor and then licked half of it up again and left the other part for the cat to eat and we walked off into the sunset and lived happily ever after" akkkk
im going crazzzy. its time for beans
are you happy?
does that make you happy?
it makes me incredibly happy.
you know why i write this?
neither do i.
10/is it the 22 already? wow
its been a long time since i have updated this, sorry. over the weekend laurel came home, and i didnt really see her much at all, except for thursday night, laurel, me, chad and lauren (yes, all the close family) went out for ice cream. what good grammar i have.
but thats beside the point
ive decided that i talk to david too much. its almost as if hes becomeing a part of me. like an interactive diary, hes what i have always looked for in a friend. i mean, i love it when people vent at me, and he always gives me advice on everything.
if only here were more davids in this world
changes, im sick of them.
but then how would we move forward? we wouldnt, we'd be forever caught in an abyss of ignorance, and that could be fun, i mean, ignorance is bliss
sicut cervus de siderat adfontus
i guess.
,---- ()()
'.,--( ;;>:
\ , /
'-'''
what a beautiful mouse
i want to be ready next time, i want to be kissed. so much for being cynical about love. screw that. im allowed to reinvent myself as often as i like. anyway,
i'll try to update this before warren nags me next time. 10/16
it's golden, thats all i have to say.
that and my computer's freaking slow and wont let me do anything. grr, thats soo annoying
and i dont know what else there is to say.
i like taking showers
at night
i cant remember the time that happened last...
just now stupid
what i mean is
what about the floor show?
in a dark house
in the middle of the night
i had a weird day dream today
i was just like, how did this get into my head?
now THat'S all i have to say. 10/15
i missed the meeting that i was supposed to go to yesterday.
oh well i dont think i would have been able to make it there even if i had remembered, because well, i dont know, actually i probably could have but mom went to see dracula the musical. go figure. i made fried rice, and dan, lauren and chad came over for dinner. how strange. we're going to pick up laurel from the airport in th V'dub, and then we're all going to homecoming! greeeeeeeat.
i wasnt really planning on going, but i guess i am now. not to the dance, but i'll go to the game. part of the game. to see the float. the theme is soo lame this year. oh well
my mom is mad at me.
im going to go now.
10/14
what a beautiful sunday morning it is. i wish it would hurry up and be winter, because i love drinking hot chocolate and being in sweats. i want to eat hearty meals and fall asleep in front of the fire. i want to sing christmas carols.
dude, i was so mad today because somebody sent me a chain letter that said "if you love jesus then pass this on." or something equally as annoying. and now im sitting here wishing it was winter time so i could sing christmas carols. how incredibly contradictory can i get?
anyway
last night was hella fun. me and lauren went to bruce's birthday party and it was really funny. we saw this lady that looked like an orangitan. (i dont think thats how you spell it) but it was funny. elsigay told us how to raise our children (as usual) and the waitress was so dumb it was funny because we always sing happy birthday my dad goes "hey david give us a B flat" and he does and we sing. but the waitress started us all off, and david i swear freaked out. it was pretty funny. anyway, me and lauren left early, and we went to dan's house, where colin and dan were recording the intro to their cd. it was a good time, but we didnt stay very long because my parents were being anal. i was in the bathroom and i started ringing. anyway. some of the songs that they sang were really funny. i particularly like the dinbran song, and she hates your gutz
man i serioulsy love those guys. i mean really.
anyway, we left the house and lauren and i started talking about how hot colin was in that hat, and some other things... and lauren's cell had accidentally speed dialed dans house, and they were listening to our whole conversation. i thought it was funny, but lauren freaked out, saying "omg! how embarassing!" funny stuff man. thats so random. i dont think ive ever listened to somebodys converstion without them knowing it. they had been listening for over 4 minutes. lauren was seriously embarassed. haha oh well.
man i hate ensemble the people in this class (all girls) already think that i am pretty weird. mrs. basilio hates me becuse she thinks that i am overly ambitious. just because i tried out for student leader, and i always ty out for solos, that doesnt mean a damn thing. this doesnt make sense to me. i hate that class, i cant dance and they make us dance. and not just dances that are easy either. the hold us in for rehearsals at lunch sometimes too. and that takes away time from my friends... i seriously dont like anyone in that class except for dolores, who i hate singing next to, bcause she has a very... powerful voice, and its not always on key. the only other person i like in there is hillary, a little jewish girl, who wants to be part of the jewish clergy. (religion shmreligion), every one else that ever bothers talking to me is a snob, and they tell me that im doing something wrong, even though i know more about music than over half the class, gawd it pisses me off. enough of my rants. im going to do something interesting with my lovely sunday 10/10
im glad that i dont have a set pattern to how often i write entries.
i was thinking to myself today, dude i am sooo glad dubya is our president now instead of clinton. i mean, seriously, if clinton were still president, the other countries would have said "eh, clinton can handle it" and they wouldnt be backing us up right now. hooray for dubya!
the truth is i dont care. i just dont want to go to war.
terrorism is an idea, not a county, or a group of peoples. how can you declare war on an idea? its not possible. people are targeting afghanistan because thats where the idea originated, but by bombing afghanistan you dont rid the world of the idea. sure the people of afghanistan were raised to believe that america was evil. it doesnt mean that other countries dont agree. and it doesnt mean that everyone in afghanistan believes it. anyway. im sick of it.
i say anyway too much, and friday is mom hill's birthday celebration.
also, on saturday, bruce is having his birthday party, i dont know where we are going, but i want to go, i love singing and having the whole resturaunt clap. the funniest part is when the waiters try to sing, and they just end up lip synching the whole thing. man i love that group of people.
its go time. 10/8
hahaha, im a sweet potato. :D
atethedog: youre a sweet potatoe
atethedog: potato, i mean
anyway, david rhoads thinks i like him, its funny. i wish i had saved the conversation. haha.
what the hell is this? us bombing afghanistan. i was talking to peter about it, and he didnt know we had bombed them yet. how sad. i say "hey pete, how do you feel about us bombing the afghans?" he says "you guys waged war on blankets?!!" it was hella funny.
anyway, what a lovely day. i have a buttload of homework. =D 10/6
today im in a really good mood. i dont know why. maybe its because the gymkhana is tomorrow and i had a really good night last night.
last night lauren christi warren dan colin becca and megan came over and it was fun, we watched old movies of lauren and me and megan dancing in talent shows
quotes for the night: "wow, its weird seeing erin without boobs"(becca) and "bitchez and hoes" (warren) actually the other one wasnt that funny, but dan almost peed his pants when warren said it. oh and you know we all love banjo lauren.
gret and eric are going to be here in about an hour, so that will be fun i havent seen them in a while. we're having veggie burgers for dinner--bleagh
anyways, tonight im spending the night at laurens. i swear, we should make things easier for ourselves and just live together. i mean, she spends enought time at my house anyway, we share each others clothes, and we do have an extra room. it would work out nicely, too bad she has a family that she lives with, and she gets 60 bucks a month for living there. not that she ever uses it because she stays at my house and eats my food all of the time.
more than all of the beans in the world i want chex mix in my pants. no not really, i dont like things in my pants all that much. but i do like chex mix. 10/3
this entry is for warren, just because you care
well not really, but its okay.
im such a geek, seriously
i spend waay too much time online, especailly talking to david (mainly about leah), and dan (mainly about clams and butter) and preston and jake. its called i have no real life, i just pretend i do. but i do have the best friends a girl can have, and im not just saying that. i mean, i really do love you guys, and i would be lost without you.
that is, more lost than i am now.
ive decided that even though i try really hard not to be, im a relatively boring person.
boring like norman rockwell paintings
same same same. i hate norman rockwell
great artist, but have you ever been to one of his exhibits? its boring, because theres just a certian monotony to it, and last time i went to one, there was old lady stench.
except for a couple that caught my eye
but mostly boring
what a great comparison to my life
i do try though. to be interesting i mean.
it just doesnt work like id like it to be
10/02
art. AP. its all about prometheus.
fire bad
uncle sam
damn patrioticness, i mean destroying the american flag
i think its cool and everything, but gah, it takes a national crisis to show you care about our country
i didnt care about it before, i dont care about it now
america sucks. i mean, its obvious why other countries hate us.
if another country took up 6% of the worlds population and used up 60% of the world resources, you wouldnt like it either.
oh well america. i love my country, i hate my people.
that is
if i was queen of america
this entry is too contraversial, dont read it.
anyway.
dont we all wish we had the book of answers
the book of answers would suck though
it would tell you bs answers like "follow your heart" and "do what you think is the best thing"
damn the book of answers
lauren doesnt need answers, she needs questions
i want my monkey man 10/01
mmm chocolate syrup.
did i ever tell you that i really love you, and i think about you all day? i really miss you and wish i could kiss you, but why are you so far away? 9/29
wow its been a long time
sorry bout that ive been really busy with... things.
anyway im up at berkeley visiting laurel. its been fun so far... last night i vomited. which was super duper, and i still feel like crap, i just came home frome the football game and crashed it was sooo great. 9/24
at least now i understand what was wrong. seriously, i hadn't a clue before.
brandons a drug dealer. he told me himself.
not really.
colin drove my car, and then it wouldnt start. but that wasnt his fault, my car is PMS-y, bu then they left me, and that was their fault.
i want that belt back. i miss it. i am going to cry
sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell
i figure, dude, jakes a sheep, and i'm a freaking goat. hell yeah it makes sense look, like, "where's your flock?" dude its religion, and dude, im like "i havent any, sheep"
dude. i say dude too much.
warren says "you cant read freaken green on a freaken red background."
i say "word"
like i actually take notes. dude, mrs. combs is so dumb, i want to hit her in the jaw, so lat least she couldnt talk with that annoying listhp. grr.
she says "frumula" instead of "formula", too. how is that not annoying. i sit and draw in that class.
k well
its hitting the sack time
9/23
dude, its 3:30 and i just woke up. its so hot in here. im suffocating. its called i have a stomachache and a headache. i seriously dont know whats wrong with me. okay so i do. but that shouldnt effect anything. 9/22
lauren can read my mind, if shes in the same room with me. whick kindof scares me, because well, how would you like it? especailly if you were thinking... oh nevermind, you dont want to know what i think.
well you might
but im not going to tell you.
damn butterflies on my computer.
this is all chirstis fault.
this is bothering me. i wish lauren were here so that she might read my mind some more. that, or just talk to me about it. i dont know what to do. ive ruined everything. and its too late now.
im blaming you, lauren, just for that.
you made me think about it.
i hate think ing baout it. it makes me realize how much worse it really is.
dude why do i wait so long for everything. am i stupid or retarded? what is it? id really like to know. theres nothing i can do about it now. im fucked. and reatrded. grr. anyway. i'll live, for today. its tomorrow i'll have to worry about. i dont want to thin kabout anything.
damn i want some chocolate. why did aluren have to take the symphony bar? oh well. i'm pooped. 9/21
i think its the 21.... and if its not, it will be in bout 2 mins. anyway
i miss scott. i dont know what happened, but he's not here, or there. or wherever. maybe he doesnt like me, or maybe something worse happened... i don't know. i just dont know.
yeah, well. i like going to brian's on friday. i think im going to be doing it a lot more, because i dont know, dan has an ashley. im happy for him, and he writes lovely screenplays. ::shakes head and smiles::
lemme see if i got this right, becca is dan, with three boobs, colin is me, dan is colin, and i am becca? i think thats right, but correct me if i'm wrong.
and i have tim curry.
tim curry is great actually. i mean, it does take a real man to dress like that, and have it filmed.
people are sad.
the marjority of people i know live in a small bubble of world. extreme denial, and a fakeness about their everyday lives that just bugs me.
our football team is 3 and 0, amazing.
me and lauren had a good time getting into that football game i tell you.
"oh i didnt know that we werent allowed to hop the fences to get in...."
that was pure comedy.
we almost made it, i swear. if lauren hadn't freaked out. haha.
i think i'm gonna go to bed. i'm tired and grumpified. 9/19
ooh boy, dubya
ive decided that there are too many leahs int his world i mean, who would make a girl like that? i want to be a leah. im so sick of hearing leah stories from david and pat. leah leslies, whatever. its just too much for me.
anyway, jake told me to start reading the bible, job in particular, saying things were never as bad as they seemed. so i did. and it was.... interesting. ill tell you about it if you ask, and promise not to get offended.
yes.
anyway, its been a long day.
9/18
im getting sick of the month of september, it seems to me like its taking too long.
dan is my least compatable match. i thought that that was pretty funny, considering that we're good friends. i dont even remember if i answered it right or not. but oh well
*NSYNC!
bleagh.
anyway,we like hot cakes in our pants, oh yes we like hotcakes in our pants.
me and jessica are having a bet in spanish to see who can make joe like us by then end of the year.
whats probably going to happen is jessica will try to hard, and he will be scarred for life.
and have to go through long and extensive psychotherapy, during which his therapist will decide that he has an inferiority problem.
and he hates his father.
and then he'll cry and i'll cry, and jessica will get sent to jail for sexual harrasment...
again.
but anyways
moving on...
una dia fue una chica llamo maria. maria le gusta comer los flores, maria le encantan los flores rojos, porque los son mas deliciosos 9/17
what a boring day.
i mean, the highlight of my day was driving that extra 30 miles to take nick home. good gad. what a boring day.
im starting to like mr. morales more and more, and i think that he likes me, which is always an added bonus. i came into this class seriosly thinking i was going to hate my teacher and let him know baout it, but its not like that at all. i mean, mr. morales is pretty damn rad.
except for when i walked up to him today to ask him a question, he only came up to my chin, that was startling.
he asked me to give an example today, which was cool.
ive realized that all of the male humanities teachers that ive had, ive ended up liking and all of the female i end up hating more or less, i mean... ms. henry, ms. vidana, ms. glavas, okay brisbois wasnt that bad, and neither was cooper. i think it might be the married thing... id ont know, im trying to find reason where there isnt any at all. oh well.
mrs. brisbois was bob dole.
she carried around that pen wherever she went, hah.
have you noticed that my entries keep getting longer?
how sad.
i went to talk to mr. collins about the war thing, and he got all pissy at me and fed me one of these "we must make an agressive attack" type things. i was really expecting to get hell for what i am doing, but i thought at least mr. collins would be with me. that kind of shut me down for the day. oh well, im seeing greg tomorrow, and that will be good, i guess.
i just need an adult with me, and not just warren and brandon, because even though warren and brandon are both very cool guys, they have no voice really, and people wont listen to them.
so i say fuck that, i mean, who cares. im so sick of it anyways, i just thought id at least TRY to make waves but my waves dont even make my goldfish blink.
im really sorry for grabbing your testicles, colin. i was asleep... i swear
i didnt mean to
i have rugburns you idiot, hanging out with you guys is dangerous.
i cant wait to go to millencolin
my stupid tape pooped out on me, this angers me greatly
it was a crappy tape, but still
it had sentimental value
okay so it didnt... so what?
goldfish dont even have eyelids.. what was i thinking?
9/16
i went to a play with krysia today, at the la jolla playhouse. it was called "diva". the characters were well developed, and parts of it were funny, but the plot sucked. anyway, we had fun and it was the first time in a long time that just me and krish hung out. we went to round table afterwards. i had mom's plastic, hehe.
italian garlic supreme is excellent.
right now im talking to dolo about RHPS. i love it man.
i went out to lunch with emily, elsiegay, and pat. they were all wearing some sort of american flag. i showed up in a black shirt.
its not that im not patriotic, i just think that being patriotic doesnt mean that i should think the same way everyone else does. like greg said, "conformity is the poison of society."
"fuck jingoism, fuck nationalism" -warren
war ::grunt noise:: what is it good for?
i sure as hell hope that thats not what it will come to.
He who is willing to sacrifice liberty for temporary safety deserves neither safety nor liberty. 9/15
i had a good time last night.
i fell asleep at krysia's computer, and i woke up in her bed, which was kinda creepy. lauren said that i was making a lot of noise coming down the hall, and i said, "there are grapes in my bed" and "i won the election" while i was sleeping. but what else is new?
colin can take off his underwear without taking off his pants. impressive.
my arms hurt from doing the worm.
i talked to greg for a really long time on friday. he told me that i could call him if i just wanted to talk, which is really nice, because hes pretty easy to talk to, and he totally agrees with me on a lot of political issues, which is pretty awesome, because hes got a sensible view on things, but he is very stong willed, and it makes me happy that our counrty isnt made up of daniels, even though im sure that over half of the population is like that, which frankly pisses me off.
a lot of things do.
hey guess what? im most like a squirrel, coming in first with 400 points. trailing came dan with 100 points, and in third was becca with 50 points. hooray, im a squirrel.
i'm also most like craig.
but beccas most like becca, i guess that makes sense.
i want to be the night security. 9/13
today has been a boring boring day, considering how much sleep that i didnt get last night. hey at least i finished my HRRs. that was important. anyway
i havent talked to scott or david for a really long time and its been bothering me. i'll live.
i dont know what to do.
im cold,
confused,
maybe a little scared.
but it shouldnt change anything right?
i dont know what i want anymore 9/12
HRRs are sooo fun.
i LOVE american studies.
the articles of confederation BLEW
i LOVE the declaration of independence
integrity is...
okay im done, i'm all mr. moralesed out. 9/11
what the hell is going on?
this is so crazy, but to tell you the truth, i dont really care anymore. i see it so much on TV, i hear it so much i'm just so sick of it all, you know?
my mom is crying. sure its scary, but not worth crying over. theres nothing that we can do
do you think that this is just an evil ploy to try supermans powers? they musta put lois lane in danger at the same time, because superman didnt do much to stop it all.
we dont know that this is a forgien attack, i sure hope that it is, but people said the same thing about the oklahoma bombing, and look how incredibly wrong they were.
i'd like to think that people would never be so cruel to thir own country
i was watching this thing on tv, and it was other countries adressing the united states. i got this little mental picture in my head. the united states is this big bully guy,and there are a whole bunch of little weak kids standing behind them. the little kids are taking smack about america, and they all get together in a huddle. a stone gets thrown by one of the little nerdy kids, and it hits big bully america in the head. now big bully america turns around and he gets this mean look in his eye, and all of the little guys say "hey america... whats up, did i ever ytell you what an incredible basketball player you are? and you are so smart too, and i bet you getr all of the girls, because youre so handsome" and immeadiately america turns to the little guy who is sniggering behind his hand and pounds the shit outta him. and the other countries stand there and watch because its better to be on our side then to get the force behind that fist.
what happened to the world trade center is like when you see a car crash on the freeway. at first youre mad, because people gawk, and stare, and it makes your commute a lot longer due to traffic. but then you want to help, so you get out of your car, with the rest of the people on the freeway, and pick this guy up and dust him off, the best you can do, and then you get mad again and want to hurt the cause of the crash. but it was a hit and run so what are yousupposed to do? you got the guys car style and color and year, so you go and attack all of the 89 black camaros on the road. that will solve your problem, it sure will.
people are dumb.
this analogy is dumb.
stop reading this. 9/10
wow. yes thats all i have to say.
no, actually. i'm supposed to be working on my stupid HRR's but i'm not because ive got more than half of them done already, and i just CAN"T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!
anyways. i sure do hope that colin is enjoying his sweet vagina, because it seems to me everyone else is. haha avia.
yeah well. i have not been in the best mood lately. and by lately i mean yesterday. man i dont know what it was but everyone seemed to be pissed at me because i'm a selfish bitch. never seemed to bother them before.
anyways, thanks for the CD's warren, they rock. however, i cant play them in my car :(. but i am going to copy them onto tapes on wednesday so i can listen to them in the car.
tomorrow night a bunch of people are coming over for the pampered chef party. i guess this is my mom trying to cure her empty nest syndrome, because i dont exist. at least i dont anymore. i just hide in my room. my mom thinks im depressed, and she wants to take me in to the psychistrist. does she not understand that its her thats annoying me?
oh well. i guess i'll just wallow in my own self pity for a bit, then get some ice cream....
or bananas.
9/9
what a great weekend. not really. i went to brians on friday (as usual) then went over to dans, which was boring, because i talked to colin online the whole time.
i feel so sorry for colin. hes going to visit laurel sometime this week.
monkey fresh kicked jeff out, which royally screwed them over because now that colin went to san fransisco, they have no bassist and no guitarist. just horns and rythm. which isnt really that great because that means no words.
johnny quest thinks we're sell outs.
last night i went to dans and we watched rocky, and some kool aid cartoon thing, which was really stupid, but made me laugh, and then robin hood. and we played a lil pool, and he kicked my ass every time except for one.
i got a new cell phone. it maches my car. hey, at least i'm not as vain as cameron! but thats not saying much now is it?
9/5
pre cal is the most boring class in existance! i know all of that stuff, and mrs. combs is a ditz.
anyway, i was inspired by her son john.
yes i know all of her childrens names. theres cathy john and oh god whats the other one? oh well its probably qantas, (haha, just a lil mrs. wilson humor for those of you who had her)
but anyways
there was this poem that he wrote on the desk which is right in fornt of me (i sit right front and center, so no sleeping in class...bummer)
this was his poem
Hands are Wonderful Things
a poem by John Combs
hands write for others to understand (uh huh)
they invent perfect solutions
They fight to be joyful to win (i can just see a lil hamberger helper guy...)
They love with feelings and care (riiight)
They open doors (a fact!)
To the wonderful light (wonderful light....mmmmm)
They give glory to what they see (oh god hands can see???)
Touch with tender ease
There is nothing
They cant do!
(i sure hope this guy isnt thinking of becoming a poet any time soon)
okay i was inspired...
Elbows are wonderful things
a poem by Erin Hanscom
They create support for arm wrestlers.
They bend to move your hands to open the door to the wonderful light
You can jab your friends in the ribs with them
They give glory to what they hear.
When I think of elbows, it makes me happy
There is nothing
They cant do
well anyways
the weather is great, wish you were here.
9/4
and thus begins school. school beautiful school. this year i have some pretty cool classes, but i know i'll probably end up hating them, eventually, like the end of tomorrow.
anyways. PBS is going to start practicing soon, and we might have a new guitarest, christy sledge. shes really nice, she was in my summer school class, and we played butts up.
i have spanish first period with jessica jen and mayce, which is an awesome way to start off the day. jessica makes my life so much easier.
second period is pre calc. ugh. our teacher is mrs. combs and so far she seems like a pain in the tushie. adam dole sits next to me (ugh) and cameron and warren and lindsey are all in my class, which i guess is an okay thing, because i can ask warren for help if i need it.
third is ensemble. i sit next to dolo.
fourth is art, i met some guy named matt, and he seems pretty cool. but he didnt take 3/4 either so he was freaking out, i guess that it doesnt make much of a difference. dan thedell and scott both sit at my table too, which is pretty rockin, because they wont make my life boring in that class, not that id ever be bored anyways
tthen after lunch its all morales. ive got tony in my class so its not that bad, buts still. its american studies. how good can it get? 9/3
istanbul not constantinople. anyways, zac and mijeong came over today. it was a rocking good time watching zac chase around the cat on his hands and knees. dude, he's like 28! it was pretty damn funny if you ask me. 9/2
just got back from a play called the larmie project. it was very well done, and funny too, dispite its dark plot line. (it was about a kid who was killed because of a hate crime.) i thought it was going to be really dry, but it was pretty good.
i hate opening up my email and the only thing there is junk. it makes me feel sad that nobody thinks of me unless they are forwarding things. oh well. say la vee or whatever.
have you ever just wanted to crawl into a hole and die? thats what i feel like right now. it takes too much out of me to think about it.
but on a happier note, preston thinks that i am a dumb head. he said so himself! i think preston is cool. actually, its all i can think of. preston preston preston!
i think S is the best letter ever. it looks like its getting its groove thing on, and thats whats important. 9/1
this is the greatest day of my life.
my mom is mad at me because dan was over here till one last night.
today was a good good day for me. i gave a presentation in the morning for the yearbook class at oak grove which was fun. i think i could do that for fun if i went to all of the yearbook classes... but anyways. i got chocolate. i was late to suzy's by about 2 hours because i just could not leave because they were asking me so many questions! it was entirely annoying. but fun, i'll have to admit.
sooz's party was fun, and i cant wait till my birthday when i get a kiddie pool full of beans to call my own. i really hope that they do that because it would make some really funny pictures.
i acidentally smeared a handful of cake frosting in soozees hair. i swear, my hand just slipped... twice...
i met a guy. his name is bernardo. hes kind of the silent type, bit one hell of a lover. (we checked out sooz'a bathroom for a bit.) poor becca though. having to see me with somebody new. ("its not unusual to be loved by a plastic flamingo... its not unusual to dance around with a plastic flamingo... but when i see you hanging around with that plastic flamingo, its not unusual to see me cry.... and start heading for the texas-shaped chips." -becca when she found out about me and bernardo.{actually she didnt sing that, but it would have been hella funny if she did...})
i felt bad for coming late and having to leave early, but to day was a busy day. i hada good time hanging out with krysia and lauren at mareks big birthday bash. i felt bad for leaving that too. theyre prolly still out partying. i hope marek isnt peeing on the lawn like last time... ::shudder::
anyways. yeah. im too pooped to poop. which is a good thing i guess... because our toilets arent working. everything stopped working in this house at the end of four months. stupid stupid. it makes me mad! >:(
well its been a long day. well its been a long, been a long been a long been a long day.
happy birthday, sooz. i hope your day was as great as mine.
8/30
11:49 pm
ive decided that megan is the best person in the world. i mean, who would sit online and neglect brandon at 11:49 pm and listen to me bitch? nobody except megan. and so if i may digress from this evenings imposeum, i'd like to sing you a song. its something i picked up on during my career as a dancer. ahem, i liek milk. thank you.
oh gosh. no matter how late i go to bed, or how late i want to sleep in, i always always wake up at 8:30. why is that? its annoying, especially because that means i only got 6 hours of sleep. and i even had all morning to sleep in.
i'm helping danielle out today. i think i mentioned that yesterday.
im very annoyed because this stupid website wont let me put a guestbook in. its not like i really need it, but the motovo website inspired me... dont ask. i was the only one besides colin to sign their guestbook. it was sad. i feel special.
i still have the bracelet on from family fun center, even though it's pink and doesnt match anything i wear i think that that is how many days? oh well suzy i'm going to win our 3 dollar bet!
i was talking to megan about making a busness. i think i could do it, but for some reason megan has doubts. i so think we could pull it off, and people would buy it too. i mean comon, that is such a good deal. oh well, i just got waaay too excited as usual.
anyways, its 9:37 in the morning. i do not know where my dinner is.
this kid scares me a lot. im serious, click at your own risk! come see the band of gods and neighbors 8/28
wow its been a long time since i have updated this. in the past couple of weeksi have... oh i dont know. ive sewn a lot, and i'm going to add a page of all of my sewing creations, as slutty as they might be. ive decided that red is my favorite color.
anyways, im am sorry for my amarillo friends,(david, scott preston, jake, and daniel even though he doesnt live there i still consider him one of the gang...) who have headed back to school. apparently, wednesday is the day when you recieve the most ammounts of homework in amarillo, so ive been told.
i really like the rocky horror picture show. i AM just a sweet transvestite from transsexual, transylvania. dan hates it though. this doesnt make sense to me.
tommorrow, i am going to help danielle out with her band stuff. its not like i play the trumpet, but i do know my music, and im sure that i can be of some assistance. and if not, at least i can pretend i'm being a good pal, i mean what am i here for?
ive decided that of all my girlfriends, jessica is by far the coolest because she doesnt care about flirting and that kind of stuff. i mean i love lauren and christi, but their lives revolve around penises. i hate it how dan doesnt hang out with suzy anymore because of their breakup. i mean, its just stupid, that they were so close and then they broke up and wont talk to each other. and christi and dan dont talk at all either. well they do, because of me... nevermind.
i am not a skank. i like that shirt that i made, dispite the sluttiness. and that dress isnt that bad. its actually really cute you have to admit. and who can go wrong with polka dots? nobody. thats who.
i want to go to the beach.
i will not run around naked.
8/17
my sister is leaving for berkeley tommorrow. i dont know wht im going to do, ill miss her so much. all of her stuff is packed and in the car, and i have to drive. oh boy oh boy. so what do i do in the few precious hours i have while she's still home? work on my website of course!
chads over here right now.
i finally figured out how to put pictures on here. oh boy.
last night, we were supposed to get toilet papered by the cross country guys. but nick saw laurel at albertsons picking up water balloons, so he called a retreat.
dan came over last night too, to pick up jesses swim suit that he left here the night of the where the hell is dan party.
how come whenever people come over to my house to pick something up or drop something off, they end up not leaving until after midnight? this just doesnt make sense to me.
and how come people always leave things at my house? maybe its because they want to come pick it up. i bet thats it. |
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